You Better Know Yourself, So You Can Grow Yourself
Just how difficult is it to find the Yin to your Yang, the piece to your puzzle, someone to create a balanced relationship with? Join The EmPOWERment Couple as they candidly get to know themselves a bit better and discover the importance of knowing your partners in life. The duo finds themselves uncovering new personality traits and shadows to confront while they take quizzes and dive deep into some self-awareness rabbit holes. Be sure you have a long drive or a kitchen full of dishes while listening because this is a massive episode!
Be sure to subscribe and share our new podcast with your community! xo, Zuri and Mikey
Challenge: Take all 6 journeys with The EmPOWERment Couple!
Episode 3 Show Blog
Did you know that scientists have calculated the odds of you being born? You may be shocked to find out how many variables have lined up, just to present the opportunity of you being who you are, right here, right now. Those busy scientists have calculated the odds of someone born with your exact DNA, on this planet, at this time, and estimated the number to be 1 in 400 trillion. Not millions, or billions, but trillions. Now, what do you think the odds are of you meeting someone, whose unique 1 and 400 trillion design, can offer the chance of enjoying a balanced relationship? Just how difficult is it to find the Yin to your Yang, the piece to your puzzle, someone to create a balanced relationship with?
Since the beginning of human civilization, our most brilliant mathematicians, astrologers, yogis, scientists, and spiritual leaders, have been steadily working to tip the cosmic odds in your favor. From these gifted souls, we inherited more than a handful of systems that function as user manuals for the human experience. We’ve identified 6 of these systems you can use today, to better know yourself, your life’s purpose, and who to partner with to have a balanced relationship.
Now, as we talk about relationships, it is imperative to focus first on the most important relationship. The relationship you have with the Self. Each of these systems provides you with a precise manual to be more self-reflective. Once you know how YOU work, you can understand how to keep your mind and heart in alignment. You can also understand why you manifested past problems, as well as making sense of past successes and how they came to fruition. So, start with self-love! Self-kindness, self-awareness, and self-respect. Make this commitment a must, not just a desire. You are unique and the more you know about you, and why you’re here, the more likely you can create your most beautiful life.
There are three steps to creating a balanced relationship.
- The first step: Know who you are by reading your user manual.
- The second step: Know who you are having a relationship with, by reading their user manual. Have you ever asked a lover, a friend, a family member, or a co-worker, “Why are you treating me this way? Maybe you should read their user manual. Wouldn’t it be nice to know how he or she functions? I almost threw out a pair of noise-canceling headphones when they failed to work properly. Luckily, I had a user manual and found an easy fix. How many relationships have we thrown away because we felt powerless to fix them?
- This brings us to the third step in creating a balanced relationship: Combine your user manual with their user manual! In doing so you could create a user manual detailed to the relationship’s best chance of success.
Therefore, it’s important to take these tests with people you’re in a relationship with to learn how best to move through life in harmony with them. See it as a job interview, determining whether or not a relationship is a good fit for both of you. It’s why one of the most cliché, pick up lines is, “What’s your sign?” But, it’s actually a great line if you also find out the rest of the story. We suggest that your best first date question would be: “Tell me your time, place, and date of birth.” Now, you may risk coming across as a psycho but if you explain the reasoning they may just give you the keys to getting to know them way better than spying on them on Instagram or stealing their phone when they leave it on the table.
There are literally thousands of personality quizzes, compatibility tests, strengths finder, and identifying tools online. While you can take the Facebook type quizzes to find out what celebrity is your perfect match, that isn’t going to serve you as much as it will help Facebook store your information for later advertising use. The six online assessments we chose, are easy to take, and within a few minutes, you will be well on your way toward self-awareness and thriving in a balanced relationship.
The Three Dosha Types
This system breaks every human down into three minds/body types: Vata, Pitta, and Kapha. Based on the Ayurvedic system, the Dosha’s link our bodies to the 5 elements: Earth, fire, water, air, and space. The Vata Dosha is a combination of air and space, Pitta Dosha is a combination of fire and water, and Kapha Dosha is a combination of earth and water. We are typically a combination of two Dosha’s, with one being more dominant than the other. Each dosha thrives under a specific lifestyle, to include the foods we can tolerate, and what our optimal climate is. This is important to know if your dominant dosha states that you like dry weather, and you live in a humid climate. More than likely, your body will display symptoms of dis-ease. If left unchecked, a dis-ease will progress into a disease. Once you know your dosha type, then you can detail your diet and lifestyle to fit your needs. You can also modify your diet and lifestyle to fit your partner’s needs. What’s your dosha? Take this quiz and find out.
Astrological: Sun Moon and Rising Signs
The ancients looked to the sky for clues about why things happened in the material world around them. Astrology was popular in the Hellenistic period, 3rd century BC. Visit any of the ancient ruins, such as the great pyramids or Stonehenge, and you will notice there is always a sacred place or alter to track the sky. The placement of the moon and sun and stars identify their relationship to the universe they were part of. Simply put, we are a reflection of everything we see above. So, Astrology is an excellent tool to understand yourself and your relationship with others. Here are some basics: we are governed by the moon and sun, without either or, our life on this planet would be entirely different. Therefore, we each have a sun and a moon sign.
Just as there are twelve months in a year, there are twelve signs of the zodiac. Just like seasons, they are divided into four groups, each containing three of the signs. The 5 elements are represented by the twelve zodiacs. The fire signs are Aries, Leo, and Sagittarius. The earth signs are Taurus, Virgo, and Capricorn. The air signs are Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius. And the water signs are Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces. The element of space is what holds the zodiacs together. Typically speaking, water signs are driven by emotion, earth signs are practical, fire signs are impulsive, and air signs are intellectually oriented. Before you discount Astrology to pseudo-science, keep in mind that it predates all of western science and is just as accurate now as it was for our ancestors.
The Chinese Zodiac
The Chinese Zodiac, like Astrology, is a cyclical system. The Chinese Zodiac is based on the ancient origin story of the Great Race, which determined each animal’s position in the zodiac. The Chinese Zodiac, known as Sheng Xiao is set to a twelve-year cycle, and each year in that cycle is related to an animal sign. These signs in order are the rat, ox, tiger, rabbit, dragon, snake, horse, sheep, monkey, rooster, dog, and pig.
There are five elements: fire, earth, metal, water, and wood. Each element is linked to motivating forces in your life. For example, fire signs are inspired by the excitement, earth signs are motivated to secure foundations, metal signs are driven to create order, water signs are compelled to form emotional bonds, and those born under the wood element have a desire to explore. For those already lost in this ancient system, just know that the Chinese zodiac is used today by matchmakers and interior designers that follow in Feng-Shui. Each sign and year carry either a Yin or Yang symbol. Odd years are Yin and even years are Yang. Yin is the black area of the Yin-Yang symbol while Yang is the white area of the symbol. Yin-Yang represents opposite qualities such as light and dark, male and female, create and destroy, give and take and night and day. In order to create harmony, both Yin and Yang need to be present. Are you and your partner in harmony, or are you both fighting to be Yin? Spend a few minutes to figure out where you are in the great race!:
Numerology And Your Life Path Number
The numerology most frequently practiced today is based on the teachings of the ancient Greek philosopher, Pythagoras. Math geeks might know about Pythagoras and the Pythagorean’s Theorem. Pythagoras believed that the physical world was comprised of the energetic vibrations of numbers, and developed a system that corresponded letters with integers. His practice was a study of numerical interconnectivity. Much like astrology, numerology shows your talents, ambitions, strengths and weakness, and even your greater purpose. If it’s good enough for Pythagoras, it may prove to be helpful in developing your user manual.
This system was developed in the 1950s by a psycho-spiritual teacher and later refined in the 1970s by a psychiatrist. For those looking for a more modern, scientific explanation, the Enneagram is well-rooted in both science and spirituality. Essentially the Enneagram is a model of the human psyche based on nine personality types and the connections between those types. Here is a basic description of the nine types:
- The Reformer: rational, purposeful, self-controlled, perfectionist
- The Helper: caring, demonstrative, generous people-pleasing, possessive
- The Achiever: adaptive, excelling, driven, image-conscious
- The individualist: sensitive, expressive, dramatic, self-absorbed, temperamental
- The Investigator: intense, perceptive, innovative, secretive, isolated
- The loyalist: committed, engaging, responsible, anxious, suspicious
- The enthusiast: fun-loving, spontaneous, versatile, distractible, scattered
- The challenger: dominating, self-confident, decisive, willful, confrontational
- The peacemaker: easy going, receptive, reassuring, agreeable, complacent
For those who are steeped in the corporate world, know that many successful corporations use this test to create a harmonic and effective workplace. For those who are looking to create a harmonic household, this test will set the tone for collective self-awareness and can illuminate the path toward enlightenment. The test can be completed in less than 10 minutes, so by the time you finish your coffee, you can get the Cliff Notes on both you and your partner.
Body Graph and Human Design
Human Design is a personality assessment, personal growth, and self-empowerment tool that offers practical solutions for living the highest expression of who you were coded to be. The goal of this system is radical clarity so you can manifest your life purpose with the least amount of confusion, frustration, and anger. Your body graph provides a blueprint of your makeup and you’ll get the user manual for how you’re wired and how to navigate this life as this unique type. It’s been said that working with your unique design configuration makes it easier to be in the “flow” and to attract what you desire. You can run your chart at My Body Graph. It’s free. To find your unique human design you’ll need your date, time, and place of birth. You can use your birth certificate for this information.
Once you get your body graph back you’ll be introduced to the Human Design system comprised of nine centers, thirty-six channels, and sixty-four gates, all of which present as either open or closed, connected or absent, on or off and if you’re confused, like I was, just stick with me for a couple of minutes here because the payoff is worth it. Have you ever wondered about your energy dynamics and personality characteristics and where they came from? In simple terms, human design is about who you are designed to be and it gives you permission to operate in your own style. This is why understanding your body graph is going to provide you with a lot of clarity and with clarity comes power. You’ll likely feel a lot of relief and have some “ah-ha” comments. When you look at your body graph, keep in mind that most people shy away from this tool because of its science-like or medical visuals. What makes the human design complex is its density because it combines several belief systems and sciences such as the chakra system, the tree of life, astrology, quantum physics, geometry, astronomy, genetics, and biochemistry. This makes the combination of your human design very complex, after all, there are 2 billion different configurations.
The body graph and human design background come from a man named, Ra Uru Hu, who had a sudden and unexpected mystical experience in 1987 in Ibiza followed by an encounter with “a Voice” that lasted for eight days and nights during which he was exposed to the human design information. Interestingly this encounter happened during the January 1987 supernova explosion that was witnessed and studied by astronomers worldwide. Ra considered himself a channeler of the Human Design System and dedicated the next 25 years of his life to teaching the System.
Human Design helps you understand the other people around you and the nature of YOUR relationship with them. This becomes important information for determining what jobs to take, how to work well with others, and what role you will play when you work in teams or in the family dynamic.
The best part of human design is it gives you permission to be exactly who you are. It may even help you fall in love with yourself in a more accepting way. I call it, surrendering to your design and my experience with the surrendering is what made me fall in love with this system. You won’t question why you need to make decisions in the way you do or why certain things flow or cause you to fumble. The key points to review are authority, non-self themes, strategy, centers, and your type.
There are 5 types with unique roles and strategies:
Manifestor: approximately 8% of the population
- Role: to initiate action from ideas
- Strategy: inform everyone in your “impact field” before you take action
- Non-self theme: their non-self theme is anger.
Generator: approximately 37% of the population
- Role: to find the right work and the right partner in life
- Strategy: wait to respond with your Sacral energy before you take action
- Non-self theme: their non-self theme is frustration
Manifesting Generator: approximately 33% of the population
- Role: to find the right work and the right partner in life (and to find the fastest way to do things)
- Strategy: wait to respond with your Sacral energy then inform everyone in your “impact field” before you take action
- Non-self theme: their non-self theme is frustration and anger.
Projector: approximately 21% of the population
- Role: To manage, guide and direct the energies of others
- Strategy: wait to be invited into life’s big decisions (love, marriage, career, where you live), and wait to be asked or recognized before sharing your wisdom
- Non-self theme: their non-self theme is bitterness
Reflector: less than 1% of the population
- Role: to reflect the health of our communities back to us
- Strategy: wait 29 days (full lunar cycle) for clarity before you take action
- Non-self theme: their non-self theme is to be disappointed.
When you dig in you’ll learn more about what this all means. So, for example, Mikey is a generator and when Generators use their natural wired energy correctly and follow the inner guidance of their Sacral response they are a powerful force that benefits the world, and this sign makes up the majority of the workforce.
I am a manifesting generator and when I found out that my sacral response guides me to the “right” work I have nearly inexhaustible energy to do that work and get it done FAST! I can run circles around my team and my focus is unmatchable. I become obsessed and get it done magically. In the past, this has led me to feel frustration with others but I see that my design’s non-self theme is frustration which makes a lot of sense. Your not-self themes basically tell you when you are not in alignment with your purpose, or in this case your programmed design. So for me, I need to appreciate others’ designs that are not the same as mine and therefore not hold them to the speedy standard I have for myself. If this is interesting to you, we will go into this deeper with a special guest that specializes in the Human Design system on a later podcast.
We hope you enjoyed this process of self-discovery and if you want us to cover more of any of these areas, please leave us a comment. Please consider sharing our podcast, subscribing, and sharing this post on social.